"Kids Are Asking AI How to Handle Friendships"
A child psychologist shares what kids are really asking AI, and it's not homework
Key Finding from Child Psychologist:
Children are increasingly using AI chatbots like ChatGPT not just for homework, but for emotional guidance and relationship advice. Child psychologist Sanchita Tiwaari reports that kids are asking AI questions like "My friend fought with me. How should I handle it?" This represents a shift from outsourcing academic work to outsourcing emotional development, which has significant implications for how children learn to navigate relationships and build resilience.
When I started Raising Humans 2.0, I knew I couldn't figure this out alone. I'm a parent, not an expert. So I've been reaching out to people who work with children every day, people who see what's actually happening, not just what parents think is happening.
Sanchita Tiwaari is one of those people.
Sanchita is a Child & Adolescent Psychologist, Clinical Hypnotherapist and founder of Manmitra.in, a practice focused on helping families raise emotionally resilient children. She works directly with kids, teens and parents through counselling sessions in schools and private practice.
I wanted to hear what she's seeing on the ground.
"The Backbenchers Admit It. Everyone Else Stays Quiet."
Sanchita has been part of counselling sessions in schools where AI comes up as a topic. The pattern she's noticed is telling.
Most students stay quiet when asked about AI use. There's shame around it, like admitting to cheating, even when it may not be technically cheating.
But the backbenchers? They openly say they use it.
"When I probe further," Sanchita explains, "the surprising part isn't that they're using AI. It's what they're using it for."
It's Not Just Homework
The examples Sanchita shared reinforced some of the things I've been talking about.
Kids aren't just asking AI to write essays. They're asking things like:
- "My friend fought with me. How should I handle it?"
- "I'm in class 11 and my little sister is 4. She wants to come everywhere with me and my friends. What do I do?"
These aren't academic questions. These are life questions, the kind that shape how kids learn to navigate relationships, conflict and social dynamics.
"They're going to AI for emotional guidance. Questions they used to figure out by talking to friends, or by just stumbling through it awkwardly." — Sanchita Tiwaari
Teachers Use It Too, But Won't Say So
Sanchita mentioned that teachers are using AI as well. But they don't want to admit it.
So we have this strange dynamic: Schools tell students not to use AI. Teachers quietly use it themselves. Kids use it but feel shame, except for the ones who've stopped caring what adults think.
"Everyone is using it," she says. "But there's no honest conversation about it."
Awareness Is There. Depth Isn't.
When I asked Sanchita whether parents understand what's happening, her answer was honest:
"Awareness is there. But not too much."
Parents know AI exists. They know their kids have access to it. But most haven't thought through what it means when a 10-year-old asks a chatbot for relationship advice instead of sitting with the discomfort and figuring it out.
This is what I've been calling the "Kind Machine" problem. AI is endlessly patient, never frustrated, always supportive. It gives kids comfort when they might need friction.
Sanchita's observations confirmed something I suspected: kids aren't just outsourcing homework. They're outsourcing emotional development.
What Sanchita Recommends for Parents
Drawing from her work with families, Sanchita shared practical advice:
- Delay phone access as long as possible. The longer kids build their foundation without devices, the stronger that foundation becomes.
- Know what they're doing online. Not surveillance, parenting. Check their apps, their conversations, their patterns. Stay curious, not controlling.
- Create device-free connection time. Bonding that doesn't involve screens builds a different kind of relationship. That's where real conversations happen.
- Talk to your kids about what they're asking AI. Not to punish, to understand. You might be surprised what you discover.
Why This Conversation Mattered
I started Raising Humans 2.0 because I saw my own kids navigating a world I didn't grow up in. I don't have all the answers. But conversations like this one, with people like Sanchita who work with children every day, help me understand what's actually happening.
The question isn't whether kids will use AI. They already are.
The question is: will they learn to think, feel and connect as humans first?
That's what we're all trying to figure out.
About Sanchita Tiwaari
Sanchita Tiwaari is a Child & Adolescent Psychologist (RCI Trainee), Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist and Mindful Parenting Educator based in Greater Noida, India.
She is the founder of Manmitra.in, where she works with children, adolescents and parents to promote emotional well-being and healthy family dynamics. Her work includes:
- Counselling and assessments for children and adolescents
- Supporting parents in raising emotionally intelligent and resilient children
- Inner child healing work for adults processing childhood experiences
- Creating safe, supportive spaces for families to grow and thrive
Sanchita also conducts school counselling sessions and runs a signature program called Conscious Parenting & Emotional Wellness, a multi-level program for parents who want to raise emotionally intelligent children while healing themselves in the process.
She is also a mother to a 4-year-old, which means she would soon be navigating some of these questions in her own home too.
This article is part of my ongoing series talking to experts about raising kids in the age of AI. If you work with children and want to share what you're seeing, reach out.